“I Understand” – Most Impactful Phrase You Can Say
Children are often complaining, be it about school, food, bed time, temple, etc. Most parent resort to comforting them in upbeat tones. Telling them fun thing to look forward to during the day.
This can be exhausting for parents. It is also difficult to come up with good and different answer when you have been doing the same thing over and over. Eventually your response becomes insincere. They can sense your insincerity and are often not convinced.
The Power of “I Understand”
Reacting with “I understand” when your child comes to you with a problem, concern, or even simply a tale about their day will help you to really be sympathetic to their sentiments. It helps children to feel heard and supported by validating their emotions and experiences. You can plan activity or tell them to find fun thing.
Useful Strategies to show Understanding
Passive Listening:
Pay your youngster your whole attention while they talk. Make eye contact and demonstrate your active participation in what they are saying.
Think back on that.
To demonstrate your listening, ask your youngster to repeat back what they said. Say, for instance, “So you’re feeling upset because your friend didn’t share their toy with you?”
Compassionate:
Imagine yourself as your child and show sympathy. “I can see why that depressed you. It had to have been rather difficult for you.
Steer clear of judgment.
Steer clear of offering advise right away or rendering judgment. Your youngster may simply need to feel understood rather than directed on behavior.
Show Empathy
Instead of attempting to stop their complaining with vain comments, try putting yourself in their shoes. Tell them you understand. That it is difficult for them to do what they don’t want to do. But explain to them that it is necessary.
Your child has emotions that might not be logical for you to understand. But, by validating those emotions and letting your child know that you understand and empathize with them, it can go a long way for building a great relationship based on empathy, understanding, and trust.
So next time try saying to your child “I understand” and watch their response.
